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Money Matters: How Newlyweds Can Avoid Conflicts about Cash
Couples should learn how to work together and trust each other’s judgment
(ARA) - Starting a life together is one of the most exciting times in a newlywed couple’s life; yet disagreements over money matters can strain even the strongest of marriages. Different styles of spending and saving can be a source of great conflict for newlyweds.
It doesn’t matter whether couples are getting married right after college graduation, blending two families together after years of being a single parent or after living alone for most of their adult lives. Regardless of the situation, it is important that newlyweds understand how to trust the process of working with and relying on their spouse’s judgment.
As associate professor in clinical and counseling psychology at Argosy University in Dallas, Dan Clement, Ph.D., believes that newlyweds need to learn how to trust their ability to make difficult financial decisions as a couple.
Some newlyweds may find it hard to make tough financial decisions together as a couple and will consequently try to make all the decisions unilaterally or be complacent and let the other person make the decision. This happens especially if either person senses tension in the discussion.
“As a professional therapist, my biggest challenge in pre-marital counseling is getting couples to see past the illusion that falling in love makes everything else irrelevant or that you will naturally agree on everything just because your partner makes you feel wonderful,” says Clement.
Though the idea of falling in love appeals to almost everyone, except maybe Tina Turner with her “What’s Love Go to Do with It?” mantra, the feeling that love will solve every challenge in marriage is unrealistic.
“A big part of making a good decision about the person you will marry is seeing who you are, who they are and who you are as a couple,” added Clement.
Clement suggests that couples look for a marriage and family therapist who is certified to give assessments designed to help couples get a good start in handling financial conflicts before they get married.
Couples are spending a great deal of money and time planning their dream wedding; however, having a successful marriage probably has more to do with the plan a couple creates to tackle tough financial decisions than it does with making wedding plans.
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